The issues of attractiveness are important to any case.

      People love their cats more than their own bodies or themselves.

      For men, attractiveness starts between mother and son.  Men get
their first warm fuzzies about their own body from their mothers.  If
their mother's look upon them with disgust or frigidity, its going to be
hard slogging later.  This can even affect the development of the body
so it BECOMES unattractive.

      A man with a chronic defensive or offensive service fac in
operation is going to be pretty much crippled in appearance and

      Some men can also be sent into higher planes of consciousness by
some stellar 'illegally pretty' girls.  The shock of the higher plane,
along with the shock that the girl 'has it' and the man doesn't can send
the man into a permanent dwindling spiral of inferiority.

      The man is actually experiencing himself, but its under the control
of the pretty girl, and when the pretty girl walks away, the man loses
it.  That makes the man 'needy' which is a negatory to the girl, so its
self enforcing.

      Men also have a hard time finding their own bodies attractive, as
they are men, and men aren't supposed to find men attractive maybe, I
dunno.  It just seems to be that there are lots and lots of attractive
girls in the world, but the men all look like boogies to me, except for
a very few which I note with due exception.  Sometimes I get the feeling
that if *I* were a girl looking for an attractive man I would kill
myself from the scarcity.

      On the other hand I find that girls tend to not be as sensitive to
physical attractiveness as men are.  Men and women are not the same in
this regard.  If I wanted to be chauvanistic about it, I could say that
women depend on men's ABILITY more than men depend on women's ability,
so women have evolved to be attracted to ability rather than exquisite
looks, and men have bred and selected women who have the exquisite
looks.  So things have gone different directions between them.

      Lights = beauty, brights = intelligence.

      "Daughters get their lights from their father's brights.
       Daughters get their brights from their father's lights.
       Son's get their lights from their mother's brights.
       Son's get their brights from their mother's lights."

      When young you find the pretty girls hanging out with jocks, dumb,
ugly, but strong as hell.  Well that's an ability, namely to protect the
girl from attack.  Later some of them figure out that being smart and
having a lot of money is better than being strong, but the guys are
still ugly.

      Once in a while you will find a women who isn't trying to fulfill a
survial dependency who will fall in love with some Adonis worthy of her

      Anyhow many men, who understand physical attractiveness all too
well, but have no real clue what attracts women about men, have the
distinct feeling that they as men could never be as attractive to a
women as the women is to them, that puts them into an instant permanent
out exchange.

      The sensitivity to attractiveness in men, if its like with me, is
so well tuned that a man will tell you immediately whether a women is
positive, zero or negative.  Looking at a negative women is like
listening to noise all day long, looking at a positive women is like
listening to good music.  One is chronic pain, the other is chronic
pleasure :)

      In other languages the woman says to the man "Your face
is easy on my eyes."

      Pretty girls to a man are like comfort food, they melt his body,
they make it peaceful, they *HEAL* it, they give it reason to live, to
go into first gear and get to work, they make him feel like he can deal
with anything, face any future, give his life.

      Ugly women make him want to kill himself now.

      If one runs into a truely interstellar girl like I did with one
Rachel many years ago in 1985, it will take the man right up face to
face with God and light and beauty forever for free.  He might even
cough up a religion like ADORE to deal with the ascension experience and
resulting crash.  Hell this girl glowed in the dark from behind when I
didn't even know it was her!  And she wouldn't give me the time of day.

      "Dedication to Adore,

      For Rachel, whose Gorgeous ExCaliper and Magnificent Respect
inspired it all, and whom I Adore for EVER, for FREE."

      Later in the Forgotten Book of the Dead, the dark side of Adore,

      "Dedicated to the MAG BODS who spit and kicked dirt in my face
until I knew they were right.

      Gorgeous JAPs don't date Christian Wimps because her meat is
Kosher, and his meat is crucified."

      MAG = Magnificent, JAP = Jewish American Princess

      Now if the man looks at himself but doesn't feel he is positive to
himself in his own eyes, he can't imagine that any women would find him
positive either.  This leads to a permanent depression about women,
because he figures women will feel about him the way he feels about
negative women and that is just death to him.

      It is permanent hopelessness, lost the race before out of the gate.

      So he tries to 'make up for' not being attractive by ...., you fill
in the blank with any substitute for attractiveness that might yet
attract a girl anyhow.

      If his life experience is that EVERY women he looks at, smiles at,
or says hello to gives him 'A go away you slime ball before I scream for
the police or call my dyke buddies to beat you up', then after a while
he becomes non functional, won't go outside, won't socialize, won't do
anything with his life.  Mostly he is just waiting to die to get it over

      He lives in a world where saying "Hi" to a pretty girl is the same
as goosing her from behind.  And lots of girls feel that way, they are
TERRIFIED of men, won't look them in the eyes, and won't say Hi to
random men passing on the street, except in the movies.

      When these girls die and their whole life passes before their
eyes, they will see an awful log of sidewalk cracks.

      The man will see an awful lot of find 'em ... forget 'em.

      When he does go outside, he lives for the brief moments when some
pretty thing does smile at him and return his hello, it will make is
whole day, restore his faith in life for a few hours.  But it won't ever
lead anywhere, because he knows this pretty thing smiles at everyone.
Its still a win though for him.  He wishes all of womanhood were like

      If the only peace he finds in his life are sleep dreams of pretty
girls that bring him healing and peace, then his dream world becomes
more real and important than his waking world.  Of course in his dream
world his own body *SOMETIMES* looks more positive in dream mirrors than
in the real world, so he holds onto the possibility that he could look
that way in the real world too someday.

      Many people will bring up the issue, but what about the being
inside the body?  Isn't there an attraction there too?

      Uh well, what is a being doing inside a body in the first place.

      OK, some quick thoughts.

      Most pretty girls have bodies that AS WORKS OF BEAUTY AND ART are
far and away superior to anything that the being in the body will ever
produce or create as an artist in their lives.

      Rachel to me was way beyond any art that exists on this planet,
including the 5 great piano concertos that move me so that I am also
learning to play them.

      I mean music moves me, but Rachel *SENT* me to places of candy land
and star drive that I had no clue existed before.  She opened up the
face of God itself to me.

      The being in the body was a putz.  Almost no one home, at least no
one that would talk to me :) I tended to find that over the years, the
prettier the girl, the more air headed they were.  Once in a while I
would find depth in a pretty girl, but mostly the deep ones where the
ones that needed bags over their heads.

      I figured eventually there was a correlation, and I should figure
out what it was before I died in this life :)

      You see rather than HAVE a life, this kind of guy forms a
substitute life of trying to figure out why he doesn't have a life, so
perhaps he can warn others in the future to not make the mistakes he

      The point is that I have yet to run into ANY being that had as
strong an effect on me as pretty BODIES have.  Usually the beings in the
bodies were a detraction from the beauty of the body.

      Many years later when I finally figured out 'what is was with
girls', namely fear and jealousy, I was able to start digging a few
females out of their nonsense, and they became of positive value, as
beings, to me.

      They're still ugly though.

      And THEY hate it as much as I do.

      In fact they hate me for even being interested in 'pretty girls',
the very ones they wish they were.

      So you get it from both sides.

      You get whapped by the pretty girls for looking at them, and you
get whapped by the ugly girls for looking at the pretty girls too!


- ------------------------------------------------------------------------
Homer Wilson Smith     The Paths of Lovers    Art Matrix - Lightlink
(607) 277-0959 KC2ITF        Cross            Internet Access, Ithaca NY    In the Line of Duty

- ---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Sat, 21 Feb 2004 02:12:16 -0400
From: David DeAngelo 
To: shimon 
Subject: The Secret Reason Men FAIL With Women

The Secret Reason Men FAIL With Women

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    As you can probably imagine, I interact with a
lot of guys who are having problems with women. And
one of the things that I've noticed is that almost
every guy that is "failing" with women has an EXCUSE
- - a "good reason" why things aren't "working" for


    I have come to believe that most guys who aren't
succeeding with women carry around a "Secret Excuse"
for why they're not succeeding... a Secret Excuse
for failure.

    For some it's their height, for some it's their
age, for some it's their income... and for some
guys, it's a reason outside of themselves... maybe
it's the place that they live, or where they work.

    What's YOUR Secret Excuse for why you don't
succeed with women at the level you'd like to?

    If you can, stop right now and write down your
own personal Secret Excuse for failing with women.

    Then, see if you can figure out where that Secret
Excuse came from. Did something happen in your life
that led you to believe that your Excuse was REALITY?
Did you have a particularly traumatic event happen
that led you to your excuse?


    Here's the most interesting part of this
particular phenomenon... NO MATTER HOW "PRIVATE"
OR "PERSONAL" your Secret Excuse is, IT'S VERY

    And guess what?

    I guarantee you that there are MANY, MANY guys
in this world that have overcome your very same
situation and gone on to succeed with women.

    I think that the "Secret Excuse" is our way
as guys of making it easier to avoid facing


    But the PROBLEM with a Secret Excuse isn't
the excuse itself... it's the fact that most guys
don't  know how to OVERCOME their Secret Excuse.

    Secret Excuses can wire themselves into our
minds so deeply that we don't even realize the
effects that they're having.

    If you believe that women won't feel attracted
to you because you're, say, overweight, then you
won't even TRY to meet women. You'll just assume
that it's no use.

    This leads to even worse problems, like fear
of going out, fear of talking to people, etc.

    When you decide that there is some big reason
that is preventing you from even the POSSIBLITY
of success with women, it begins to affect
EVERYTHING in your life.

    So what's the solution to this MAJOR cause of
failure for men?

    I'd say that this is at LEAST a two step

1) You need to identify your own "Secret Excuse",
and you need to look around to find examples of
men who have overcome the very same "obstacle",
and who have gone on to succeed with women. This
will provide you with some real-life evidence
that what you're dealing with is not final and

2) You need to get an education about women and
what makes them feel the emotion of ATTRACTION
for men.

    It really amazes me that you can walk into a
bookstore and find a thousand books on computers,
but ZERO books on what causes women to feel an
instant SEXUAL ATTRACTION for a man.


    But it's true.

    One of the reasons that I've put so much time,
research, effort, experimentation, and dedication
into figuring out this area of life and experience
is because I really want to be able to explain it
better than anyone, and help guys get this part
of their lives handled.

    If you want a WORLD CLASS education about
women, dating, and ATTRACTION, then I recommend
that you invest in my Advanced Dating Techniques
CD/DVD program.

    In that program, you'll learn literally HUNDREDS
of different concepts, strategies, and step-by-step
techniques for making women feel ATTRACTION.

    You'll learn everything from how and why women
behave the way they do, to how women test men and
how to "pass" every test, to how to walk, talk,
behave, and communicate so you increase the
attraction that women feel for you.

    I guarantee two things:

1) You will learn DOZENS of things you didn't know,
and haven't heard before ANYWHERE. I'm not kidding
at all about this. I've pulled together information
from many different areas... from science to
statistics to my own personal experiences getting
to know guys who are VERY successful with women and
testing what I learned from them. I'll tell you
right now, this stuff will make you open your eyes
and say "wow".

2) You will be thrilled with what you learn, and
you'll get more dates with more women. I guarantee
it. In fact, I BETTER than guarantee it. I'll send
this program to you MY RISK, and if you don't like
it, just send it back to me and don't pay. I really
feel that this is the way things should be - you
ONLY should pay for and keep things that you get
value from. And think about it, if you don't get
value, then why should you have to pay...? This
offer is 100% serious, and it's "no hassle".

    Bottom line: Go order your copy. Let me help
you get on the FAST TRACK to success with women...
instead of staying on the SLOW TRACK.

    The program is here (and make sure you go
listen to and watch the samples on this page):

    ...and if you haven't downloaded your copy of my
online eBook "Double Your Dating", then you really
need to get that handled. You can go download it to
your computer right now, and be reading it in
literally a few minutes from right now. It's here:

    I'll talk to you again soon.

       Your Friend,

       David D.

P.S. If you'd like to send me a Success Story,
Question, or Comment, follow these guidelines:

1) Keep it short and to the point. Two paragraphs

2) Tell me what's working for you before you ask
your question. I appreciate all of the "Your
stuff is great" and "I don't need to tell you how
well your stuff works" comments, but the fact is
that I DO need to hear all of the specifics...
because this helps other guys to see what's
working in different situations.

3) If you have a Success Story, write "Success
Story" in the subject line of the email. I read
these first.

4) At the end of the email, give me your initials
and tell me where you're from.

5) Send it to me at:

...don't just hit "reply" to this email. Thanks!

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Inc., All Rights Reserved. Double Your Dating
and David DeAngelo are trademarks of David
DeAngelo Communications Inc. You agree to all of
the following by accepting and reading this: You
understand this to be an expression of opinions
and not professional advice. It is only to be
used for personal entertainment purposes. You are
solely responsible for the use of the ideas,
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Communications Inc. and all members and affiliates
harmless in any event or claim. If you are under
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