THE REAL HOMER

     For those of you who want to know the *REAL* Homer, well here it is
in blunt detail.  And for the very brain dead, no I am not trolling.

     If Ken Urq were hanging by a thin branch from the side of a cliff,
I would have to think twice before extending my hand to help him.  I
wouldn't want to squirrel with non standard tech, you know.

     If Lamont Johnson were hanging by that same branch I would go
gather all his certs and awards, and accolades and prizes and drop them
on him, one by one, until the added weight broke the branch.

     If Harry Palmer were hanging by that branch, I would ask him if he
had discreated it yet.

     If Alan Walters were hanging by that branch, I would lower down a
pen and a non disclosure agreement, offering to help him once he signed
it, but I would let him figure out which hand to sign it with.

     If Allen Hacker were hanging by that branch, I would yell down to
him, "Accept, Accept....".

     If Filbert the nut were hanging on that branch, I would offer to
help him if he were to convert to the Jewish faith, otherwise I would
offer him a cyanide capsule with Irwin Rommel's name on it, "Dont worry,
its quick and painless", said Hitler.

     If KP were hanging on that branch, I would suggest to him that he
was hallucinating, and I would leave to find a quieter spot.

     If Muldoon were hanging on that branch, I would call down to him,
"Don't worry, be happy".

     And if Ron Hubbard were hanging on that thin branch, I would jump
down on him to see what the world looked like standing on the shoulders
of giants.  If I liked what I saw, I would help him and me back up the
cliff.  And if I didn't, we would both fall together.

     And to all the Chris Schafmeisters, Rod Kellers and shit hole
meatball carrion dwellers of the world, who tried to subvert a.c.t from
its true purpose and who consider clearing a joke, I truly hope they
find their biologically immortal bodies through science so that they can
spend the rest of time worrying about when it was going to die anyhow.

     And to any of you who think I have been trolling all these years on
any matter, at any time, to hell with you forever free.  When your ovens
open to swallow you up, there will be no help from me when the steel
doors close behind.

     And to the rest of you not included in the above, it is good to
have some real friends in the world, even if some of the theetie
wheetieness I see in some of you makes me reel with nausea.  I may be
hard on you, but I am still with you.

     For the rest I am gone.

     Homer

------------------------------------------------------------------------
Homer Wilson Smith     The Paths of Lovers    Art Matrix - Lightlink
(607) 277-0959 KC2ITF        Cross            Internet Access, Ithaca NY
homer@lightlink.com    In the Line of Duty    http://www.lightlink.com

Mon Apr  9 00:50:59 EDT 2007