ON THE WINGS OF THE DICOM III

     This posting depends on two earlier postings.

     http://www.clearing.org/cgi/archive.cgi?/homer/ado13.memo
     http://www.clearing.org/cgi/archive.cgi?/homer/adore85.memo

Homer:
> >      Some people, if you don't GIVE them any tech, they don't HAVE any
> > tech.  You see the problem with this, right?

XXXXX:
> Well so far my path has been to squirrel around until my TA is at six and
> then my ep is to cave in:-)...
> So I need a better path.

     OK, this is a good sign.  It means you are missing the real items
on your case, the ones that can kill you.  I am in the same shape, and
gain is very hard, but when it comes it is interstellar, then we crash
and burn again.

     by the way the items that can kill you are something like,

     To cause the death of (forever).
     To kill
     To Murder  etc.

     Try running "What would make you real happy to get up and start
killing people forever for free."

     That WHAT is the oppterm of your present time truncated (incomplete
GPM).

     It is the restraint on acting against that what is that is killing
YOU.  Don't forget the ANDS, to kill AND not to kill at the same time.

     Don't figure that anyone has it all taped out, they don't.  People
who are 'stable' are for the birds, just skating on thin ice, whistling
past the grave yard.

     That's why you aren't allowed to SAY anything to them, you might
disturb their pretense of an F/N and turn it into a head lopping R/S.

     They would be happier lopping heads, but what would society think?

     The computation on the case is why its right to lop heads.

     The anti computation on the case is why its not right to lop heads.

     The computation and the anti computation together form an AND.

     To lop heads AND to not lop heads at the same time.

     That's not an indecision, should I lop heads or shouldn't I?

     An indecision is idling deciding which way to go.

     And AND is a DECISION to BOTH lop heads AND not lop heads at the
same time forever.

     That's full power nuts, pedal to the metal.

     That he isn't going anywhere, is covered in the dust and smoke from
the spinning burning tires.

     Take a look at the negative awareness characteristic chart.

     HELP
     HOPE
     DEMAND FOR IMPROVEMENT
     NEED FOR CHANGE
     FEAR OF WORSENING
     BEING AN EFFECT  <- TRYING TO MAKE OTHER'S AN EFFECT AND FAILING
     RUIN             <- THIS GAME IS RUINED
     DESPAIR          <- MUST RUN CAN'T RUN
     SUFFERING        <- TERROR/HORROR
     NUMBNESS         <- BEING EATEN
     INTROVERSION     <- QUESTION ASKING, WHATS WRONG WITH ME?
     DISASTER         <- REVIVS  (ALL GAMES ARE RUINED)
     INACTUALITY      <- NO DISASTER
     DELUSION
     HYSTERIA         <- ANDS
     SHOCK            <- INCREDIBILITY
     CATATONIA        <- HEAD BANGING
     OBLIVION         <- "Who me?  What problem?"

     You are trying to bring your preclear from under oblivion, (run
nothing there, something there), to HYSTERIA (run ANDS), to INACTUALITY
(run NO PROBLEM, SOME PROBLEM) up to DISASTER and blow the reviv with
dianetics, run the INTROVERSION (spot self answering questions), and get
the guy up to DESPAIR.

     Confronting DESPAIR he will find his first God Postulate and end
the must run/can't run.  Then pull his overts on trying to win a game by
making other's be the effect, killing, death, murder, the regrets, the
collateral damage, and he becomes free to float up to hope and helping
others.

     If they run the GPM properly all the way, they exit the GPM and become neither
interested in lopping heads nor helping those whose heads are being
lopped.

     You see freedom from goals isn't human any more.

     The polite social human has simply forgotten what he wants to kill.

     That's OBLIVION.

     So he lives in drugs, sex and rock and roll, and tries to remain
civil until he dies of it, cancer, heart attacks, brain turmors,
whatever.

     Poor me, sympathy, sniff, sniff.

     Yes that is harsh, wait 'til you meet God, and see what He thinks
of your travail.

     Travail is absolutely real inside the context of the GPM, its a
travesty of ludicrous demise outside.

     Where ever and however your preclear is choking down the intent to
kill, that part of his body homogenizes and starts to die from the force
and counter force, bubbling rancor.

     It helps to have a good auditor, and to be a good auditor, but it
helps most to have someone audit you who knows they are clueless so they
don't force you into wrong items and ways of being.

     There are many of worth in the freezone.

> >      Take respect and not respect.  He respects some things, and
> > doesn't respect other things, and he takes his respect VERY SERIOUSLY.
> > You see, it owns him, he doesn't own it.  He isn't free to make things
> > he would not respect and to destroy things he does respect,
>
> So are we talking for the most part about implants, and postulates made
> after an engram that might involve the creation of ser-fac's and new
> valences?  I ask because running implants I am comfortable with, I just
> confront and sort of probe them until they as-is, with no process comands at
> all.  I have no idea how to run out or spot valences on myself.

     Run detested self images, just notice how much you detest them :)

     Yeah spot and poof is very good, using pervasion and conductance,
rather than withdrawal and resistence.  Life will present the next set
of masses necessary to run, the trick is to the find what they are
about, that's the hard part.  One has to sometimes just shut up and
confront them for a LONG time before one gets a glimpse into what they
are about, then they start to come undone and vanish.

     One expects human suffering to come from human reasons, that just
ain't right, so the human will find he has no clue while auditing, what
it is about, and once he shuts up about it, it might start presenting
itself to him, if he can handle the dicom.

     A valence on oneself is something valuable to you.  What part of
you, if it were to be destroyed or endangered, would really be a problem
to you, like you wouldn't exist any more etc.

     Those are valences.

     What gets your jucies flowing in battle?

     What is it that when someone else claims to be good at something,
it just makes you stand up and feel 'how dare you claim to be better at
this than me!' That's the valence you are being at the moment, your most
prized 'expertness'.

     What is it that makes you hit the floor running in karate stance?
That's your most detested enemy, your Nemesis One.  These two give you
reason to get up in the morning.  Morning is a good time to audit them
just after waking.  The impulse to get up dramatizes one's whole case.

>>     but as a sovereign Creator in control of his own experience as a
>>Creature, he has to be able to make both sides of the wings of the
>>dicom.

>    Ok...  What is a dicom?  Is it a dichotomy?

     Yes.

     DICOM = DIchotomy of Comparable and Opposite Magnitude.
 
>  >The Void, freedom, lives in the center of the wings.
>
> So you mean something like pan-deterninism?

     Yes.  Consider the Author.  A story of nothing but good people is
boring.  A story of nothing but evil people is boring.

     The author creates a meticulous interweave of good and evil,
producing art.  The good story is not the same thing as the good
character.  What makes a character in a story good, is not what makes
the whole story good, it needs both sides of the dicom.

     Consider what you are being.  Consider what would create what you
are being.  That gets you to spot the Creator/Creature dicom.

> >     He is parked at the respect end of the wing, trying to be
> > respectable and fighting everything that is not respectable, and thus
> > sliding ever so inexorably towards the other side of the wings.
> > Eventually he becomes an abomination.
> >      So you run any process you know that will break the process of
> > dramatization, of taking respect and not respect seriously,
> > permanently, importantly and with pain etc.
>
> Does this mean that just finding dramatizations and running them out with
> any process I like will keep me blowing charge for a few years?

     Forever.  Yes as long as it is the next dramatization in line that
really needs to be run.  If you run too shallow you will get all messed
up, if you run too deep you will scare the living daylights out of your
self and feel you have no permission 'to go there'.  If you just remain
open to what you as Creator/Creature show you, the proper ball will land
in your hands and you can run it.  Running the item is different than
running WITH the item which is being carried away by the dramatization.

> I would
> like to find something like that, that I can just keep on running and keep
> on getting better instead of wondering what kind of charge do I run next.

     One of the primary aberrations in the being is Questions and
Answers.

     The very asking of a Question can be a dramatization.  The NEED for
answers, the inability to just ask the question and not need an answer
etc.  Questions about dramatizations can take you deep into dramatizing,
as they seem so important to answer!

     The whole fabric of 'reality' starts to come apart when you start
to spot the dramatizations of questions and answers.

    The whole of TROM (a process) is based on

    The Goal to Know      The Goal to Not Be Known
    The Goal to not Know  The Goal to Be Known.

     It is in the archives under act7x.memo in the homer directory.

     The need to blow charge itself forms charge if you start to fail.
One needs to make optimum case gain.  Too much and one falters with 'no
permission'.  Too little and one starts to panic with 'I am getting no
where and time is running out'.

    Check out what drugs people do.  Downers are used to stop
case gain that is happening too fast.  Uppers are used to speed
up case gain that is happening too slow.

> >      You have simple dianetics "Locate an incident of respect/not
> > respect",
>
> If I did that I would run a chain of "respect " and then a chain of "not
> respect" ?  They wouldn't both be run together as one dianetic  item right?

     Well if you are willing to throw off Orthodox Scientology, and just
run with things as they come to you, you can run a lot of bank in a very
short period of time.  particularly if you start running the *MASSES*
and the efforts that make them through out the day, without worrying
about specific events or 'memories'.

     The being is living life like "I respect this, I don't respect
that", tick tock, tick tock, every day, all day, 24 hours a day, even in
his dreams.  You can quickly see that they form a tightly interwoven
stream of charge, like the DNA helix, that goes back from present time
into the past, and also into the future.

     Where he respects something but can't have it, he has charge, where
he doesn't respect something but has to have it, he has charge.

     So they form a sort of long term continuous spiral of mass into the
past, that ranges in intensity from light locks to heavy death efforts.
What you respect and don't respect can get you killed and make you kill
others, and get yourself killed in the name of the cause etc.

     Same is true of any dicom.

     And then you have your masses, your BT's masses, THEIR BT's masses,
the body's masses, and everyone else's masses all doing the same damn
thing, DNA helix back into the past and into the future on respect and
not respect.

     The future isn't hard to audit if you just understand that the guy
is concerned about losses that WILL happen just as bad as about losses
that HAVE happened.  There is much more charge on the future than on the
past.  Engrams from the past only charge up BECAUSE of the future.

     Try "How do you feel about your eternal future?"

     If you contact one of these things properly, like I mean its really
the next item you need to run because your whole life is dramatizing it
etc, your needle will cascade down to 2.5 and float for *HOURS* and
produce a smile you can't wipe off your face.

     Can you imagine being in love again with the AllThatIS?

     Then the next item will kick in and your TA will go to 6 and stay
there for a year until you find it.

> > you have all the Grades, Comm, problems, withholds, arc
> > breaks, make wrongs, service fac computations on the subjects of
> > respect and not respect, and everyone else's also.  You have goals and
> > terminals on respect and not respect
>
> But where can I find the comands for running goals and terminals, as I
> mentioned I have never done the clearing course?

     Forget that.  The clearing course is a lot of spotting on weird
GPMS.  Its a lot of eval.  You don't need it.  Its on the net if you
really want to know about it, but Hubbard sold it as if it were the end
all of aberration.

     The commands of the clearing course are merely to spot the given
items until the meter no longer reads.  So its spot and poof again.
You don't need any other 'process', and the items that you need to run
are right in front of your face and life, not on the clearing course.

     In looking for a process, you are looking for what question to ask
or what subject to broach.  Questions are bad for you, so take a look
at what subject to broach.  Who or what do you want to kill?  Once you
spot the WHAT, the class of whos, the whole thing starts to come apart
on its own.  

     Spot where you are dying, spot what kill/death/murder is being
suppressed, don't ask what, just look at it until you see it, and then
watch the whole game come apart in fury and surprise.

>  and you have the whole CDEINR
> > scale on respect and not respect.
>
> So for example, if "curious about not respect" got a read, I would run
> "curious about not respect" earlier similar to EP and then run "respect" the
> same way?  Or would I have to check for a read on each terminal seporately.
> Which would mean that I might be running only one terminal if the other
> didn't read??

     You seem to be very 'into' standard Scn procedure which was
developed so that one person can help another in a very standard rote
way.

     Me, I can never run E/S, because my memory as such does not work
at all.  In fact I balk at any 'remember at time' type commands.

     When I found the respect/not respect item for myself, I ran it very
simply on the meter for a while with,

     "What do you respect?"
     "What do you not respect?"

    "Spot something you do not respect"
    "Spot something you respect"

     Then it became ludicrous as I SAW the masses created by the real
time dramatization of respect 
and not respect.
 
      I also saw that asking the QUESTIONS above was just more
dramatization, and that it was more important for me to simply keep an
eye on how I was dramatizing in real time than to ask any question about
it or run any rote commmand on it.  That isn't DOING IT.

      Running 'What do I respect or not respect' is not
respecting or not respecting, do you see?

     The solution to dramatizing A, is not to ask questions about
dramatizing A because question asking is dramatizing B.  Asking
questions helps at first, but then one just gets into the grove of
DOING IT, of DOING A and watching DOING A and watching the masses
vanish and cease to affect you and drive you into further
dramatization.

      So instead I would run today:

      "Spot something you respect"
      "Spot something you do not respect."

      Or even,

      "Get the idea of respecting something".
      "Get the idea of not respecting something."


> >      You also have Adorian stair cases like
> >
> >      The Beauty of Respect
> >      The Ugly of Respect
> >      The Beauty of No Respect
> >      The Ugly of No Respect
>
> What is "Adorian stair cases" , never heard of it before?

     ADORE is my own religion.

     It stands for A Divine Operating REligion.

     A staircase is like a descending tone scale.

     The guy starts off with

    The Beauty of Memory.      Then he does something bad and goes to
    The Ugly of Memory.        Then he does a lot of drugs and goes to
    The Beauty of No Memory.   Then he realizes he can't remember anything
                               any more and goes into
    The Ugly of No Memory,     and wants auditing!

    There is lots of stuff on this in the homer directory of the
archives.

> >      So that adds up to about 2 million different 'processes' to run
> > on the pc and his items, so you choose the one that indicates.
> >
> >      Simply "What do you respect?", "What do you not respect?" is
> > enough to break into the dramatization while it is going on and kick
> > the being upstairs to Creator/Author and away from Creature/Character.
>
> And that would of course be run alternating comands right?

     Yeah, for me when I hit the item, I ran it back and forth,
listing each question until the next one became interesting, then back
to the first one again.  Nothing was run rote, too much energy to keep
composure and anality about being rote etc.

    I just kept at which ever side of the dicom was interesting at
the moment.

> I was just reading about the "Over Under" process and the author of the
> posting said that it probably wouldn't run well on solo.  So are ther
> certain types of processes that shouldn't be run solo?

     Don't know.  It takes a really deep understanding of why
processing works to understand what makes a solo process work well.

     Most processes aren't things you would do to your worst enemy,
but they get the pc to cough up or vomit up items that the pc can then
run.  The pc doesn't consciously know how to pervade, and he doesn't
know that he SHOULD pervade, and he is quite sure he shouldn't
pervade, so you trick him into pervading anyhow by getting him to tell
you about the accident over and over again.

     "Go to the beginning of the incident, tell me when you are there."

     Running this solo is like putting your nose to the grindstone.

     Forget it.  If you have an item, real solo auditing is more like
doing a touch assist on your space/time track, all around over and
under the incident.  Certainly you don't tell yourself 'Go to the
beginning tell me when you are there!'.  You poke around from
beginning to end and before and after and all over the known universe
including other's incidents until its flat for you.  If you try to run
R3R rotely on yourself, you are taking your attention off of doing
what is actually working to release the incident which is pervasion
and replication of the efforts and postulates.

     Again *LOOKING* and *NOT LOOKING* is much more effective than
looking for a *QUESTION* to ask.  Look at your life, spot the
dramatizations.  Don't look for questions to ask ABOUT your life.  AS-IS
takes place at the level of knowingness, not at the level of knowing
aboutness (questions/answers).

     People who know alot about what questions to audit others with,
tend to be in lousy case state themselves, even if they can help others.
Because they can not pervade, they can only ask questions, and although
asking another a question, in the beginning, will help him pervade in
spite of himself, asking oneself a question takes one further away from
pervading the dramatization.

     Once one gets good at pervading, one will shoot any auditor that
asks questions of you because questions are Q&A with just simply DOING
IT.

     Asking "What am I dramatizing now?" is rhetorically correct, but
lousy solo because the answer is "You are dramatizing asking a stupid
question about your GPMs, rather than dramatizing the GPM and SEEING
what you are doing!"

     The guy asking "What am I dramatizing now?" isn't dramtizing what
he is looking for, so how is he going to see it?

     Better to just give the command,

    "Dramatize your next item!"
    "Tell me about it.

     If the pc says "But I don't know what my next item is, how can I
dramatize it?" tell him to shut the fuck up and dramatize his next item!

     He is trying to look at himself doing it, that won't work, as that
is putting separation in there between the pc and his item.  FIRST get
him to dramatize it, THEN in retrospect he can start to put separation
in himself and report back what he is doing.

     Asking questions about what one is doing, is not DOING IT.

     You need to DO IT and OBSERVE DOING IT to as-is dramtization.  No
questions are needed at all.

> >      We want the being willing and able to artistically make both
> > sides of all dicoms, good and evil, light and dark, love and hate etc.
> > The Creator as Author creates tapestries of space/time manifestations
> > of these dicoms at war with each other.
> >      God is not good.  God is Author.  Creatures/Characters are good
> > or evil, and to the degree that they take themselves seriously,
> > permanently, importantly and with pain, they lose.  Because there is
> > no willingness to create the other side.  Once the Good get the idea
> > "Hey lets create some evil so we can have a game!" they are no longer
> > good, they are Author again.  That is the final E/P of all auditing.
>
> Sounds great!
> Are there items that can't be run as terminals? I mean can ideas and
> concepts and mest things all be run as terminals?

     Terminals are solid masses that are being something.

     A Teacher with the Goal to Teach is a terminal.

     They are identities, valences, taken on by the being to resist
everything that he considers bad in the world and which shouldn't
exist, ignorance, stupidity, dufussness, whatever opposes The Teacher
in his mind.

     Items can be terminals like Teacher, Goals like To Teach, or just
relationships between Teach and Taught like respect.  Run Whatever
comes up.  It's important to get the terminals, the goals and the
attitudes (like respect/not respect) that glue the being to his
Nemesis One.
 
     All are runnable and must be run with spot and poof.

     But notice it is way more important to get the WHAT than the WHO.
Mrs.  Jones was a nut case, but she was a TEACHER and the GPM is on
TEACHERS not Mrs.  Jones.

> >      It doesn't matter WHO you audit, yourself, your body, your
> > friends, your families, bugs, animals, universes, gods, BT's, etc.
> > Everyone is dramatizing.  Wherever you can get a wedge in that
> > dramatization, no matter who it is, you free someone from something.
> >      The point is to find deep items,
>
> By "deep" do you mean items that are basic or fundimental to life, right?

     Yes.  Items that underlie EVERYTHING, like respect, choice,
willingness etc.

     Doesn't matter whether the guy is being a Teacher or a Soldier,
respect is applicable to both.  Probably there isn't a terminal in the
universe that doesn't have respect/not respect underlying it.  So if you
manage to hit one of these types of items, relationships between
terminal and opposed, it will run out the charge of ALL terminals and
opposed terminals at once without ever knowing what they are!

    That makes it much easier to run the actual terminals later
when they do pop up, which they will.

     I can't tell you what item you need to run next, you will find
it, and even if you tell it to others, it won't be their next item
either, even if it is fundamental.  But as each being runs his own
items, the whole fabric of encasement between beings starts to come
apart.

> >for example just for yuks, try
> >      1.) Respect - Not Respect
> >      2.) Chosen  - Not Chosen
> >      3.) Benefit - Detriment
> >
> >      Spot them in operation, that is the basic 'process'.  Everything
> > more complicated than that is rote mechanical auditing that works and
> > serves its purpose but eventually is just so much dev-t, to a mind
> > that can make and not make at will.
>
> Yes, so I would eventually hope to just run the terminals by confront with
> no comands?

     Yes.  I would discriminate between questions and commands.

     Asking a pc "What are you dramatizing?" is a question.

     Telling the pc "Dramatize!"  "Tell me about it!"  is a command.

     When you first wake up, notice the commands you give to 'Live your
life.' Notice the seriousness, importance, permanence and pain of your
concerns about the future.  Fear and Need.

     Notice the interweave of your postulates and how you are just SURE
they are right because you OBSERVE they are right, rather than change
your mind and have it be otherwise because you are a Creator that
precipitates everything you conceive of in the very conception of it.

     Again one needs to change one's mind in the right order, the next
postulate in line that needs to be reversed is waiting for you to spot
it.  These are called God Postulates by Adore, because you CAN change
your mind about them, and alter your entire future effortlessly.  But
try to change them out of order, and they all hang up and freeze you on
a Cross of pride and shame.

     So the auditing game is to continue spotting your dramatizations in
present time, your get up and gos with seriousness, and in those
dramatizations and the reason for their existence, spot the God
Postulates that you believe are true because you observe they are true,
when in fact they are true only because in the moment you say they are.

     Once you find one of these, and you change your mind on them,
the POWER that is yours at that moment is unfathomable.

     We aren't talking 'well and happy human being here'.

     We are talking something else that makes a well and happy human
being worry about permission and places that Angels dare not tread and
Gods go screaming for their mama.

     Homer