Your preclear is a deprived child.

       Deprived of spiritual succor.

       No succor is no auditing.

       Succor is help via two way communication between live beings and
themselves on any and every possible subject of interest.

       A LOT of later life auditing therefore has to focus on inhibited,
no and refused giving and receiving of succor, help in the form of
communication, in early life.

       Auditing about NO auditing.

       Help is not food and shelter, no matter how much your parents
insist it is.  Help is CO COMMUNICATION on any and every subject ever
known to man and then some.

       If its not communication, it isn't help no matter how warm,
comfortable and tasty it is, it is only an effort to keep the slave
alive but still enslaved to ignorance, lies, deceit and SILENCE.

       Some parents take very good care of their slaves.

       Healthy as hogs, crazy as loons.

       Who now benefits from the silence of your anguish?

       Auditing doesn't have to be fancy rundowns done on a meter that
won't read anyhow and which then acts mostly as an excuse to not talk
about anything.

       Auditing is simply full disclosure and two way communication on any
and every subject of upset and confusion to the preclear.

       Auditing starts at the first moment a preclear can communicate and
be communicated at, to or with by any means whatsoever.

       In other words the first sessions start around conception and
assumption of the body, or before.

       You will find on every preclear entire areas of material, both bad
and good, that he simply never talked about with anyone, period.

       And when he doesn't talk about something to anyone, he stops
talking about these things to himself too.

       So they become GONE, where they run him from the inside.

       Life and death struggles build charge, and unless it is all erased
as life goes along, through two way communication, confession and
apology, the unspoken buries deep within the being as shock, catatonia
and oblivion and he is no longer free to live with willingness and joy.

     Not to mention some sense of humor, you know the eternal snarl is
gone, hard not to crack a smile about it all.

     Find who he didn't talk things out with, and what he didn't talk
out with them, and you will find the submerged despair charges that are
keeping him down, and powering his present time crippling
psychotraumatic state.

     Parents don't want to find out, so they don't want their children
finding out.

     The reason parents don't want to find out, is they are afraid the
knowledge will kill them.

       Then who will take care of the child?

       So a child with a fresh mind is a very dangerous thing to a parent.

       Truth can be construed as child abuse by the insane.

       They will SAY they are worried about the child, and doing it for
the child, so they suppress every subject of import, but they are doing
it to keep themselves out of an internal hell forever that they can not
escape except by skirting around the whole track skeletons in their own
closets, and the graveyard they call their minds.

     And they breed without a license, out of season and for the wrong

     Watch out for those that "Oh Posh!" the concept, you do not want
them in your Orgs, as they will MAKE SURE no one finds out anything
about anything.

     Probably the main thing anyone doesn't want to find out is how hard
they can laugh and cry.

     Real laughter has a price, torrential tears.

     Real tears have a price, gales of laughter.

     Inside each tear is the wonderousness and enormity of your love.

     Eternal love, forever for free.

     You know, like the kind of stuff that powers the sun and beyond.

     LRH once said that a dangerous auditor is one who is afraid to find

     The only thing more dangerous is the auditor who pretends he isn't
afraid of anything, he will make sure no one looks at anything he might
be afraid of.

     It's easy to test an auditor who truly isn't afraid of finding out
about anything.

     They glow in the dark.

     Since they are rare, a little honest trepidation in your auditor is
a good sign.

     You will have more confidence going into the tiger's lair with
someone who is somewhat nervous too, and can share the tears and the
laughter of your travail.

     You would think they might be worried about themselves, but its
YOUR travail that gives them pause to wonder.

     They know they can confront what they did to themselves, but what
you did yourself?

     And make no mistake about it, travail it has been.

     Your amnesia of this and past lives is TRAUMATIC amnesia.

     If might be fair chosen, but you had to make it look real to make
it stick, and then what happened afterwards been worse than traumatic.

     Its the fair chosenness that keeps it all stuck together with humor
and high appreciation for ludicrous demise.

     One purpose of your preclear's psychosomatic state is his effort to
get others to worry about him, more than they are worrying about
themselves or someone else.

     The preclear just fell off Mount Everest, and some person will be
telling him 'You are always making mountains out of mole hills.'

     Get the preclear to spot those people in his childhood whom he just
couldn't get to worry about him, no matter how much blood he was leaking
out of how many wounds, physical, emotional, mental or spiritual.

     A being can not-is, make nothing of, nail out of existence, or
discount anything.

     Remember a being can make nothing out of both eternity and infinity
in one blink, you think he can't make nothing of any travail you might
hand him?

     Find the one doing so, and then the preclear's own overts along
this same line in this and previous existences.

     Oblivion is made of "mole hills" too "unimportant" to mention.

     With enough suppression of co communication on desire, justice,
duties and rights, intimacy and vulnerability, dependency, independency,
and fair chosen exchange, eventually the preclear fails to bring up the
most awesomely egregious and serious things.

       A Child will first try to handle his purveyors of injustice by
forthright means, then failing that, by physical, mental, emotional or
spiritual force (attempted murder), and then failing that, he will condemn
himself to spiritual death in unexpressed resentment, covert hostility
towards himself and others leading to further decline into ruin, disaster,
and oblivion.

     His worst childhood illness will have been an effort to change all
that discount being heaped on him.  It might have worked for a while,
Lord save him, but then it doesn't work, so the engram contains the same
irritant person both as Golden Ally and as Darkest Foe.

     Scientology calls foes SP's, Suppressive Parents or Persons.

     You can always tell an SP by how you feel around them, and what
hell and death you aren't talking about with them.

     They do not want you talking, that's it.

     It is here you will find much of your preclear's murderous rage
sitting in a petrified AND of love and hate.

     He complains he can't remember his past or his whole track, but he
can't remember the moment he decided to put into operation his service
facsimile ploy to get worried attention from his suppressive care
givers, by making himself sick, dead and dying until they noticed and
gave a damn.

     So what do you expect?

     He needs to remember what happened between the ages of 1 and 2, and
not a tera quintillion years ago.

     But the service facsimile itself which he used at age 2 to make and
keep himself sick, injured or disabled is so old there are not numbers
to count the age.

     They don't call it the Rock of Ages for nothing.

     But he USED it in THIS LIFE to survive against insurmountable odds
at an early age when parental force and might made right, and his
significant others always ended up 'right' and 'winning'.

     So good auditing will span both periods of time involved,
alternating between near present, when he last keyed it in, and near
forever ago, when the original loss happened.

     Thus what he can 'remember' in this life, is all the garbage in his
service fac chain collapsed in on his body like a concrete coffin,
mostly stuff done to him, a lot of it pure implant template from the
beginning of time, stolen from others long ago, or taken from clusters
of other beings in his present body make up.

     Some memory.

     Every possible way to die or expire forever, and STILL not have
anyone give a damn.

     Except perhaps one poor miserable ally he had a LONG time ago that
cried at his death, and never let him down.

     And yes he has done that to others, been the Golden Ally to others,
giving them the key to lock themselves into needing sympathy forever
more and the crippling sick, dead or dying conditions to get it.

     The good Lord can't save him from that one, only he can.

     And the only way he can save himself from is own guilt is to
spot the humor in what he did to others and himself.

     That's a hard one.

     But it will allow him to spot the humor in what they did to him and

     Spot the words in the tears of the Golden Ally, all of them Grand

     "Don't leave me, stay with me, hang on, stay with me, stay awake,
don't close your eyes, talk to me, it will be OK, everything will be
alright, I PROMISE YOU, I will take care of you, I will love you
forever, I will never forget you..."

     Watch movie death scenes, and write down all the phrases people say
to the dying one, you will get a pretty complete image of early
templates on how to mess people up permanently.

     Holder phrases help keep the BANK here with him, in an effort to
get the PEOPLE in the bank here with him too.

     So every time he starts to fail in life, he pulls in all this
death, with allies crying over him, to bolster his confidence.  :)

     Thus the more dying he is, the more confidence he has.


     "The only way to survive in this place is to be sick, dead or
dying, because otherwise no one gives a damn, and everyone else is out
to kill me!"

     How sick do you have to be for others to actually want to help you
get better?

       That is actually exactly how sick he is, but he hasn't yet found
the exact OTHER that it will work on.  
     Trying it on similar others in this life time produces a luke warm
result, then a negative reaction.
     They start off becoming his Golden Ally valence but then react to
being sucked into the drama by becoming his Darkest Foe valence.

     And he hasn't found the exact other that worked it on him.

     God does he feel sorry for them.

     Stupid cat.

     The next time you want to get run over, I want to be
the one who runs you over.

     Hopefully with a big fat 18 wheeler.

     How bad off do you have to be to get others to lift a single finger
and not just wag it at you?

     Once you get better, then what happens with them?

     And when he gives this kind of sympathy, based on permanent loss of
precious, unique and fragile affinities, to others who are in trouble or
dying, he sticks them with a real package of 'help', which in their next
lives they will use when they need their courage bolstered.
     They figure the only way to survive is the way to HIM, which is
into the death engram they last knew him in.

     In order to have him, they have to bury themselves in their death
where they LOST him and he gave a damn!

     Its the humor that makes this all unauditable, humor is utterly
unacceptable when you are trying to 'help' someone with a serious
permanent loss of something precious, fragile and unique.

     But HUMOR IS THE ONLY THING THAT HEALS, so one has to spot the fair
chosenness and WHY.

     A lot of promises are made by the Golden Ally during a preclear's
death engram, and the preclear holds onto the death in order to hold
onto the promise of succor.

     "What, you mean Marilyn actually loves me?  Man life is finally great...
cough, cough, expire.

     So getting sympathy in last moments creates this uptick in tone
just before the final breath, because he is dying LOVED, DESIRED, WANTED
     "Yay!  LIfe is worth living...  thud."

     And thus in his next lives he becomes stuck at the end of the
engram trying to get the same sympathy from Rachel, and the original
engram never erases because he can't leave the end of the engram to
visit the beginning.

     The beginning of the engram is just too far away in time from
his last known moment of being loved and having purpose in life again.

     And he will dramatize these engrams of getting sympathy just before
expiry, by GIVING sympathy to someone at their last breath.

     And the Good Lord gives up on him at that point.

     No one can save the person who feels sorry for the dead.

     Or the only way to have a desire to live is to BE dead.

     And the unwittingness of all this help turned harm, would be beyond
the pale, except that far enough down the whole track, Golden Ally
sympathy and it's phrases are all in template implants where they knew
damn well what they were doing creating this kind of thing to stick
others into memories of death (which can kill you), by offering sweet
affinity and help in the engram.

     But its all tears with no laughter.

     There is no auditing in the template, no offerd way out, or these
things would disintegrate in the consideration of them.

     They are not false and covert crocodile tears either but the raw
truth is the Golden Ally didn't cry enough, or her laughter would have
blown the scene apart in the joy of omni awesome eternal love.

     Sometimes the only evidence we have that we are not just a bag of
chemicals, is that laughter at the bottom of our sorrow,

     So the true sun is below the bottom of the ocean of tears, not
above it.

     The bank is wicked.

     It's all part of the Villain, Victim, Hero triangle.

     What is hidden is: IT IS THE DESIRE FOR THE HERO that sticks the
being in the victim valence!

     The failed Hero's (Golden Ally's) plaintive cries, pleadings and
professions of love for the Victim in the engram, act as a call back to
the exact worst moment of villainization wherein the victim died anyhow.

       The hero proved his love by trying and failing anyhow.

       The victim feels sorry for putting the hero through it.

       And Yoda says "Don't try, DO."


     Anxiety is 'maybe I should run'.

     Fear is must run.

     Despair is can't run.

     Numb is waiting to die.

     You need to recover the preclear's ability to experience despair,
get honest with it, face up to it rather than run away down the tone
scale into numbness of the heart and below, and start talking about his
problems, overts, upsets, and offensive and defensive service fac

     The primary subjects to audit are eating, death and sex, and all of
their causal tendrils that reach out on the 8 dynamics into the past,
present and future.

     He may hate his mother for forcing him to eat his peas (2nd
dynamic), but he also hates having to work and produce peas on the farm
(3rd dynamic), and he hates mankind because all they do is eat peas (4th
dynamic), and hell, peas are part of the 5th dynamic and hell squared,
who would want to live in a universe where peas even existed (6th).

     We audit eating, death and sex in that order, because in this
universe, DNA survives by eating other DNA, so it is an eat or be eaten

     Making a living pretty much involves making someone or something
else not make a living, you see?

     Eating thus gives rise to the problems and losses of causing death
and being caused death, which then gives rise to the need for sex and

     If you can see eating, death and sex as an 8 dynamic survival
engine, or meat grinder if you will, running on a carrier wave of horror
and sorrow seeking humor but never finding it, you will get some idea on
how much charge the being has on these subjects.

     Once a being has handled all his charge on eating, death and sex,
in this and all possible past, present and future lives, he is pretty
much an 6 dynamic clear on dynamics 1 through 6.

     There are higher dynamics but they probably are not dog eat dog

     Some however may be go-to-hell-forever universes, so auditing

       The dynamics are:

       1.) Self
       2.) Family
       3.) Groups
       4.) Mankind
       5.) Life forms, plants and animals
       6.) Physical universe, MEST and force.
       7.) Spirits, postulates, considerations.
       8.) The Infinite, Static/Kinetic Cause/Effect

     But mother and father were primary auditors, and throw two bad
auditors into the child's holocaust of charge on 8 dynamics, and then
miss his own similar overts as a parent and auditor in previous
existences and universes, not to mention his discrediable intent to be
in a body, and you will have the unauditable preclear in front of you.

     He wants to get better but "Can't".

     What he "can't" do is talk, feel and express freely about something
to someone that he desperately wanted and needed to.

     Bring up him uptone from Numb, through despair, fear, anxiety (that
worry he so values in others,) covert hostility, and unexpressed
resentment, and where will you find him?

     Flaming No Sympathy.

     That's a dark evil that is hard to countenance, As the discount and
make-nothing-of blows off for the first time in ages.


     "Mole hill?  I'll mole hill YOU!..."

     A mole hill the original villain will presumably never forget.

     Only his own self grace and his love for the villain will save them
both from his immortal revenge in the end.

     Without self grace, the villain is toast and the preclear will
never recover his love or well being.

     It is here you will find his 'Must never happen agains', and "Must
always happen agains".

     Along with his stuck power package of "cant causes and must causes
(can't stop causing)".

     Tied up in endless charge, all he can cause is his service fac
condition, what's in the engram, and he can't stop causing that to save
his life.

     That is the sum total anatomy of why and what he can't cause and
can't stop causing, and what he has no sense of responsibility for
having fair chosen any of it.

     "Who me?"


     Permanent loss of the precious, fragile and unique?

     The goal to dramatize seriousness, importance, permanance and pain?

     "You gotta be joking, I am paying you to help me, so help me

     What kind of help does he want?  
     Only humor will heal what ails him.



     Recovering that choice will recover the preclear and his memory.

     "Yep me!  Man am I cool!"

     "Whoa, I gotta be careful with that choice, stuff."

     Restoring your preclear's willingness in this hornet's nest of
death and damnesia is an interesting enterprise and the laborer
(auditor) is well worthy of their hire.

     And so don't become a parent unless you are ready to audit a God in
carnation running away from hell forever by seeking pretenses of death
forever in bodies.

     But if you do it well, they WILL return the favor.


Thu Oct 26 15:52:04 EDT 2017